Fear and Wanting in an Uncertain Future

How to quieten your doubts, rip up your permission slip, and live life on your own terms.

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Everybody is busy. I’m sure you’ve noticed.

It’s like the faster and tougher the journey, the better the lesson and the wiser the wisdom must be.

But, do you ever catch yourself doubting, looking for validation, searching externally for an answer? Any answer. The answer. The voice in your head saying you're not good enough.

If so, you’re not alone.

It happens to us all.

It’s happened to me.

Have you noticed? There’s a bull market going on. Not only in the stock market, but in PhDs. Doctoral experts everywhere, head fucking students the world over.

But here’s the thing, the wealthiest people I know are, in almost every case, the least educated. Not a hat full of ‘O’ Levels between them, and certainly no college degrees, yet collectively they aren’t worth millions, they’re worth billions. With one trying desperately, at a certain time of the year, to not be listed in the Sunday Times Rich List, an index of the wealthiest individuals in the UK.

But I’m the world’s worst student. Luckily.

I hate that label, student. It’s a word that keeps you trapped in learning mode, in a state of not quite ready, out of the creative flow.

Realising this, I corrected the problem early.

And it’s empowering.

So, if you’ve blown your brains out on a college degree

Read on...

On Gurus

Let me tell you a story.

One day, a young man wanted to become enlightened. He set off on his journey, and on the second day, he found a guru in a nearby village. “Tell me enlightened one, how can I become enlightened and live like you?”

“It’s quite easy,” the Guru said. “All you have to do is repeat a simple mantra each night before you go to bed. To become enlightened, just repeat, ‘I am enlightened, I am enlightened, I am enlightened.’”

“It can’t be that simple,” the young man said.

“Yes, it is, but, if you don’t believe me, there are plenty of gurus in the world, and I’m sure, if you ask, you will find help.”

Disappointed with the answer, the young man continued on his journey.

And after many weeks of discomfort, travelling hundreds of miles, he found a second Guru.

“Enlightened One, can you teach me how to become enlightened?”

“Yes,” the second Guru said. “But it’s hard work, and it will take many years of study.”

“Thank you Enlightened One, I’m ready. I’ll do what is required to become enlightened.”

“Every morning at 5am,” the Guru said, “you are to arrive at the temple and clean out the latrines. It’s unpaid work because, while learning to become enlightened, you must be of service to your betters.”

The young man was delighted by his stroke of luck. I can do this. It’s only a matter of time, he thought.

And true to his word, every day, for the next five years, the young man arrived at the temple and cleaned the latrines.

He became the best latrine cleaner the Guru had ever had, but, even after five long years of service, he’d still not become enlightened.

One day, after a hard morning’s work, the young man approached the Guru asking, “Enlightened One, I have done as you instructed.

I have done my duty and cleaned the temple latrines. Is it time for me to become enlightened?”

“Yes, I believe you’re now ready to receive enlightenment,” the Guru said. Repeat this simple mantra each night before you go to bed — ‘I am enlightened, I am enlightened, I am enlightened.’”

“Honourable Master, I was told that by the first Guru I met five years ago.”

“He was right.”

“But, Honourable Master, why have I shovelled shit without pay for the last five years?”

“Because you are stupid,” the Guru said, walking away.

I love that story.

We get so caught up looking externally we miss the joy of life.

The constant search for something outside of yourself is exhausting, but the real work is internal, so stop, take a breath, and look within.

Think of all the shit you’ve had to shovel or think you have to shovel to get to where you want to be. The voice inside your head telling you there’s no pain without gain.

How many times have you said you’ll be happy when you’ve finished that project, got the promotion, passed that exam. It’s so easy, caught in the trap of perpetual studenthood, that you forget to actually live.

How many wild goose chases have you been on, looking for someone to tell you what, deep down, you already know, looking for validation to Green Light an idea.

But after shovelling shit by the ton, stop. Ask yourself, are you there yet. And tonight, when you’re brushing your teeth, take a good look in the mirror.

You’ll know. And that’s all that counts.

What you are really asking for is permission.

But fuck that.

Your greatness is already within you. Society pushes you into a perpetual future, but all the chasing and all the busyness drives fear and wanting and it’s blocking you, holding you back from living the life you want.

But it’s less about I’ll be happy when, and more like I choose to be happy now. Right here. Now, in the present.

That simple tweak is all that’s required. Your antidote to a world designed to keep you longing for a better future, that rips you out of the present, out of a state of knowing and calm, and into a state of fear and wanting, which is exactly where the system wants you.

It’s not about being perfect. It’s about having the courage to go after what you really want and tapping into your own power.

So, silence that inner critic, stop trying to be perfect, and decide to be great.

The life you seek is closer than you think.

And accepting this is your only challenge.

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